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October 19, 2014 / ldejong4

Siblings

When I was four I met my angel

Our game ending in shards of glass and bleeding wrists

Seeing you turn to ice for the first time hurt me

Like a child’s tongue sticking to the coldest ice pop

 

When I was eight you went away

Three weeks as Gaeilge in Connemara with friends

I was jealous of your freedom

But I missed you. Three weeks. An eternity

 

We drove to visit

And I remember your face watching us drive home without you

Eyes gripping tears like heavy bags above flushed cheeks

That night I slept in your empty bed

 

When I was twelve I joined your school

Like a lost child in the supermarket

It was your kingdom where even teachers bowed to your jokes

The big girls talked to me about you at hockey practice

 

When I was eighteen I had exams

Still a nervous teenager, studying was my excuse to be alone

One evening a knock on my door, “This is Claire” was all

And I already knew

 

This Christmas will see me twenty-seven

Our first without you

And I wonder will Mam still serve those mini pizzas

I won’t miss you now. Your angel has you.

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